Today was a down day. It consisted of getting to sleep in till 8am! Talk about enjoying the little excitements in life. Since people were leaving we spent the day focused on ensuring the tools were in line and well maintained. It was a rather unimportant day in the scope of things. It was one of those little mystery days where everything just feels right and nothing is too overwhelming. Plans were made, and then forgotten by afternoon naps to recover from the previous long work days. I have had the debate many times over what is the best feeling in the whole world… a sneeze? That thing that just crossed your minds, but I am too bashful to type the word? Awaking after a deep sleep due to fever? A deep hug from a loved one so missed for so long? Or maybe, just maybe it is the nap that comes upon you at exactly the right time after you have worked numerous hours that take both a physical, mental, and emotional toll on the body? Well today it was the latter. Though at any moment one of those other things may overcome this feeling, but for now I will hold waking from my nap, refreshed, as one of the most amazing feelings.
If our wonderful Incident Commander, Bob, were not such a brilliant man, we may not have had a down day. Often in the excitement of helping communities it is difficult to remember to step back and care for ourselves. It is a thing of brilliance to know that those who lead us still recall giving us breaks, and ensuring we have time for self-care. Bob is someone I feel I have known for a thousand years, and he is dear to my heart. When I am near Bob in a position of leadership I pay close attention, trying to learn as much as I can. He appears to be stoic, often deep in thought, very serious, but then he cracks a smile, or shares a hug and it is even more enjoyable than if he were always laughing and smiling. As a wanderer it is important to watch people like this and learn from them. He has so much wisdom to give and so much patience to go along with it. Sometimes watching the behaviors of such a strong leader and processing them to understand why they behave as they do is just as powerful and educating as sitting and asking them questions. Initially I thought Bob and I would be at odds, not understanding one another. As I have learned to watch and listen first and react second I have been able to process the things he has taught me in deeper ways.
The moment that we came to an understanding was a very interesting one. He had calmly told me to stuff it and I was about reading to scream like a tea kettle. We view the world differently, or so I thought. I was young, each day I grow so much older, I swear. Communication is a tricky business, especially when you take people who do not know each other, ask them to suddenly work together, and then expect that to go flawlessly? I think not. The beast that is communication takes patients, a gentle touch, a willingness to be wrong, and an even greater willingness to continue to try. The funny thing is, if you ask Bob, he would probably either not recall that moment, or tell it a different way. I was ready to explode and Bob asked me to step outside with him. We broke it down, had a heart to heart, got to the bottom of where each of us had been in that conversation, then hugged it out. That may have been the first hug from Bob, which meant more to me than he probably even knows. Each hug after that was a reflection of that first hug that meant a lot to me. Part of me hopes he doesn’t read this, and I think I should title it an ‘Ode to Bob’.
The moral of writing about such a person is that as a Wanderer, you should be paying attention to the mentors in your life. To how they react to the world and the situation, then learn from that, and ask questions. Value the relationships that seem like they are impossible, and discover a way of communication to make them possible. I am sure that I still bug Bob to no end sometimes, but I also hope that he has seen some great change and learning in me. I feel that I have gained a lot from such a relationship. Wanderers, find your leaders, your mentors, let them lead and mentor you, you aren’t doing this alone. If you think you are, well then you just haven’t gotten the point yet, so keep trying, until it clicks!
Signing off Wimberley, TX